And Finally

Bieber sex doll hits market, already out of stock

By | Published on Tuesday 6 November 2012

Justin Beaver

Roll up, roll up, get them while they’re, erm, clean? A company in the US that specialises in (unsanctioned, obviously) celebrity sex dolls has brought a Justin Bieber model to the market, and just in time for Christmas and everything.

And before you ask, don’t worry, Bieber is eighteen, so it’s all fine. Even if he does still look about twelve. Well, at least the sort-of-Bieber-look-a-like on the box of the Just-in Beaver ‘love doll’ looks like he’s late rather than mid-teens.

Says the packaging of the Pipedream Products doll, yours for just $26: “Meet Just-In Beaver, the barely legal boy-toy who’s waited eighteen long years to stick his lil dicky in something sticky! When he’s not busy beating up paparazzi he’s up to his high-tops in hot Hollywood tail!”

Though, presumably recognising that Bieber’s usual market of teenage girls are not the target demographic here, and keen to widen the product’s appeal to gay male sex toy consumers, the same promotional blurb assures consumers: “The Beave-ster doesn’t have this effect just on women – he turns straight men gay faster than you can peel his skinny jeans off!”

Good times. But don’t get too excited, Pipedream are already out of stock, though it’s not clear if that’s because of high demand or a sternly written cease and desist from Team Bieber.



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