Thursday 24 January 2013, 12:03 | By

Marnie Stern seeking fan-dates

And Finally

Marnie Stern

Marnie Stern, or rather Marnie Stern’s ‘people’, is (are) looking for love. For her, not themselves, that is. NYC-based label Kill Rock Stars – which, by no strange coincidence, is also promoting Stern’s new LP, ‘The Chronicles Of Marnia’, in advance of its 18 Mar release date – has posted a ‘WLTM’-style ad on her behalf that begins:

“Hipster guys, are you tired of seeing Marnie Stern have relationships with an endless array of losers and bores? Don’t you think a guitarist as great as Marnie should have someone special to watch ‘Law And Order SVU’ with? Do you enjoy petting dogs while eating chicken wings? And honestly, don’t you think a nice, positively cute, 30-something Jewish girl should meet the man of her dreams? We sure do!”

Applicants must live in New York City, be “gainfully employed”, have a GSOH and, preferably, share zero qualities with either “a drug addict, a slacker, or a vegan”. The label says it will pay for a first date only, but all and any dates thereafter are to be funded by the winning beau.

Apply now.

This is the newest track to be shared from the ‘Chronicles Of Marnia’ cache, as is entitled ‘East Side Glory’:

 

READ MORE ABOUT:

  • War Horse musicians fail in first legal bid to get jobs back
  • Katherine Jackson ordered to pay at least $800,000 towards AEG legal fees
  • Glastonbury Festival to have own 4G network
  • Neil Young’s Pono raises over $6 million on Kickstarter
  • Tru Thoughts founder to inspire future music entrepreneurs at TGE:DIY
  •