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MONDAY 2 APRIL 2012
FIVE DAY FORECAST
Hello everyone, I'm back from my holiday. I'm hoping my luggage will join me later today, but otherwise I had a very nice time. Anyway, you don't need to know about that. You don't want to know about me lazing around in the sun for seven days, because (like me now) you're stuck in the UK and need to know what's going on in the music business this week. Well looky here more>>
APPROVED: JOHN MAUS - NO TITLE (MOLLY)
Domino is offering John Maus' donation to the label's Record Store Day flexi-disc compilation 'Smugglers Way' as a free download. Unlike much of Maus's avant-garde playbook, it's a track you could proudly play to your parents if you so wished. Your grandparents, even. The five-disc 'Smugglers Way' collection will also feature Real Estate, Villagers, Dirty Projectors and Cass McCombs more>>
TOP STORIES
- Sony reportedly bidding for HMV's MAMA, as OpCapita buys Game UK
IN THE POP COURTS
- 'Weird Al' Yankovic joins digital royalty fight
- EFF supports claim for access to Mega servers
AWARDS & CONTESTS
- Canada's Junos presented
- Sony noms announced
RELEASE NEWS
- The Hundred In The Hands detail second album
- Dirty Beaches announce split covers single
FILMS & SHOWS NEWS
- Beatles anniversary to be marked by new West End show
GIGS & TOURS NEWS
- Tame Impala offshoot Pond to tour
- Oberhofer sets Camp date
- Lil B prepared to give 'life-changing' NYU lecture
FESTIVAL NEWS
- Festival line-up update
THE MUSIC BUSINESS
- BMG confirms further expansion plans
THE MEDIA BUSINESS
- Buxton's Bug to become TV show
AND FINALLY...
- Three Take That wives expecting babies

OFFICE SPACE AVAILABLE IN SHOREDITCH
The Shoreditch Arch is a beautifully renovated railway arch situated behind Cargo night club on Rivington Street EC2A. It was unused until 2003 when it was transformed into stunning open plan office space and became home to the friendliest creatives in the whole of Shoreditch.

www.theshoreditcharch.co.uk

[email protected] for more information.
COOKING VINYL, SENIOR PRODUCT AMD MARKETING MANAGER
Cooking Vinyl is expanding its team and is looking for a passionate music lover with at least three years previous experience of planning and managing high profile artist campaigns. You must be up to date with the current digital landscape and have a sound and current knowledge of media, marketing and retail.

Cooking Vinyl is an innovative and artist friendly independent label representing The Prodigy, The Enemy, Marilyn Manson, Underworld, The View and many other international artists. Please apply by sending your CV and a covering letter with your current salary to [email protected]

Deadline 20 Apr 2012
   
THE COLUMBO GROUP, PROMOTIONS MANAGER
Independent bar and restaurant group The Columbo Group is looking for a talented promotions manager to work on a new bar we're launching. The job is to work with the directors in creating and shaping the brand identity of the venue, and then to ensure sales targets are met through the creation and execution of both an excellent product and communication strategy.

The successful candidate will be bright, honest, flexible, hard-working, highly organised, self-motivated, enthusiastic, and will possess excellent communication skills. At least 12 months relevant experience is essential. We offer a competitive salary plus a performance-related bonus scheme. Send your CV with a cover letter to: [email protected]
   
BELIEVE DIGITAL, KEY ACCOUNT MANAGER (LONDON OFFICE)
Following sustained growth over the past twelve months, Believe Digital is looking for a key account manager to join its team of label and artist acquisition staff in the UK. A deep knowledge of the independent music industry and key labels, as well as the experience and knowledge to manage content is essential as Believe continues to drive its label acquisition strategy in the UK.

The representative will be responsible for managing relationships with a selection of Believe’s key UK labels whilst being able to identify potential new label partners and relevant business development opportunities worldwide.

The role would suit a self-motivated and entrepreneurial individual with a wealth of experience in the independent music sector and will come from a distribution background with a clear understanding of the digital music industry. 

For more information including a full job description and how to apply click here 

Please also check the Believe Blog for various other roles in our rapidly expanding UK office.
   
MUSIC CONCIERGE, PLAYLIST DESIGNER
Do you know your Oscar Peterson from your Chilly Gonzales? Award-winning music consultancy, Music Concierge, is looking for a Playlist Designer.

Music Concierge, the award-winning music consultancy for boutique hotels and luxury brands, is looking for a music playlist designer to join our small but expanding creative team. The playlist designer will develop a sound understanding of our clients' needs, and then source, program and timetable appropriate tracks in line with the client brief. (Please note this relates to designing music playlists NOT composing original material.)

You will have an encyclopedic music knowledge across a multitude of genres, including jazz, classical, pop, world music, and all forms of electronic music. You will also bring with you a bulging industry contacts book and knowledge of how to uncover hidden gems from the furthest corners of the music world. Alongside your creative talent, your professional and motivated approach to work means that you relish pressure and eat deadlines for breakfast.

For full details, and how to apply, visit www.theCMUwebsite.com/jobs

   
AMAZON, ONLINE CONTENT MANAGER: MUSIC (Attractive base + benefits)
Online Content Managers - ready to burst onto our scene? If you think you could be the next big thing in the Amazon Music Team, we'd like to hear from you. We have an immediate opening in the UK Music Team for an Online Content Manager. Working on a key account with a major label, you will be centre stage for some of the biggest releases of 2012, delivering a first-rate customer experience through best-in-class merchandising. At Amazon we work hard, have fun and make history.

You will have strong attention to detail; excellent written English and strong communication skills; an analytical approach to measuring / optimising performance; and a demonstrable ability to think on your feet and make smart decisions. You'll be highly tech-literate, with the ability to learn new systems quickly, and have experience in a related role using content management and web analytics systems. You'll be comfortable working in a fast-paced environment and managing multiple priorities, and have a passion for customer experience and the digital channel.
Due to the pace and scope of this role, we are looking for someone special to join our team. In return, you'll get an attractive salary with healthcare and pension contributions, and an Amazon Employee discount.

Motivated by more than money? Then how about a casual dress code, season ticket scheme, childcare voucher scheme and cycle to work scheme. Oh, and there's an Xbox in our subsidised onsite cafe. Ready to take this to the next level? We hope so. To find out more and apply, click here.


SONY REPORTEDLY BIDDING FOR HMV'S MAMA, AS OPCAPITA BUYS GAME UK
Sony Music is among those bidding for the MAMA Group, according to a report in The Independent. The major labels joins live music firm AEG Live and Time Out owner Oakley Capital in reaching stage two of the bidding, if the broadsheet is to be believed.

When HMV first announced it was considering selling its live music division late last year various music firms were tipped as possible buyers including, from the record industry side, both Sony and Warner, though it's the former that is reportedly making a serious bid to acquire the venue owner, festival promoter and artist management group.

It would be an interesting move on the Sony music company's part which - apart from its stake in the albeit significant Syco empire - has generally done less to diversify out of the traditional recorded music market than the other three majors.

It would give the world's second biggest player in music a notable presence in both the live and management domains in the UK, and could potentially form the basis of a new Sony unit that could be expanded globally, to take on Universal Music's dabblings in the live and management sectors.

Various sources reckon that, despite there being multiple bidders for HMV's profitable live music business, the flagging retail firm is only likely to make a nominal profit on the £64 million it paid to buy MAMA in January 2010. There had been early speculation HMV could make a tidy profit by reselling its two year old acquisition at this time.

HMV, of course, just wants to reduce its debt burden overall to keep nervous bankers on side as its retail business continues to slide, though - as previously noted - by selling off MAMA and possibly its stake in 7Digital, while the retailer may get a short-term boost, long term prospects remain bleak.

Arguably the most interesting development at HMV in recent years was its diversification into live and digital ventures, and if now left with just its core high street store network and lacklustre accompanying online etail operation, it's not clear how the 90 year old company will survive as conventional high street shopping dies a death. Unless selling tablets and headphones really is the goer HMV management continue to claim that it is.

Despite being decent enough not to gloat about it in public, HMV bosses had presumably hoped that their stores might get a little boost if their main rival in the video games space, Game, disappeared off the high street, which it looked like it might when the gaming retailer went into administration last month.

However, yesterday it was confirmed that OpCapita, the company that rescued the Comet chain last year, had done a deal with administrators PricewaterhouseCoopers that will keep the games retailer in business, albeit in a stripped down form. Just over half of Game's 600+ UK store network will stay open in a deal which sees money lenders write off half their debts and suppliers owed about £40 million between them receiving nothing. But the deal will keep 333 stores open and 3200 employees in work. It remains to be seen if there are any buyers for any of Game's non-UK stores.

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'WEIRD AL' YANKOVIC JOINS DIGITAL ROYALTY FIGHT
'Weird Al' Yankovic is the latest artist to enter the digital royalties dispute party in the US, in a wide ranging royalties lawsuit that accuses Sony Music of improper reporting of its costs, of failing to pass on any of the damages it won from file-sharing companies like Kazaa, and of paying him a record sale royalty on download sales when such revenues should be treated as licensing income, where he would receive a much higher share of the money.

The latter claim, of course, has become increasingly common of late, after FBT Productions successfully sued Universal for a higher cut of download revenue, successfully arguing that, if an artist contract doesn't explicitly state what happens with digital income, it should be treated as licensing revenue rather than record sales money. The majors have so far treated download income as the latter where contracts are ambiguous on the matter, because that way they can pay their artists a much smaller share.

Universal insists that the ruling in the FBT case does not set a precedent that applies to all artist agreements, though various artists with pre-internet contracts do not agree and are suing the major for a higher pay out. Meanwhile EMI faces litigation on this issue from Kenny Rogers, and Warner Music from Sister Sledge and Tower Of Power.

Sony Music, for its part, has offered a settlement deal on the digital royalties issue as part of a much earlier lawsuit on the matter, launched by The Allman Brothers and Cheap Trick back in 2006. That deal, which would see artists receive a 3% increase in their share of download revenue, is yet to be approved by the US courts before being put to affected artists. That Yankovic has included the download royalties issue in his new lawsuit would suggest he's not impressed with Sony's proposals.

The other aspects of the comedy singer's royalties lawsuit, actually filed by his company Ear Booker Enterprises, are also interesting. Quite how the majors share any damages won in P2P litigation with the artists whose music was actually illegally file-shared has been another contentious subject in artist and management circles for some time, as have the equity stakes the majors take in digital start-ups, which can turn into sizable pay-outs if the digital companies are bought or floated.

One of the earliest equity deals struck by the majors was with YouTube, when the record companies licensed the video-sharing site shortly before its acquisition by Google. According to Billboard, Yankovic reckons he should get a share of the profits Sony made from its YouTube stake, because when the company negotiated its deal with the then independent digital company, one of his videos - for the 2006 Chamillionaire parodying track 'White & Nerdy' - was one of the most popular bits of content on the video site. Says the lawsuit: "A portion of Sony's equity share in YouTube is directly apportionable and allocable to 'White & Nerdy' as well as other content created by Yankovic".

Sony, which last week filed papers requesting a recent digital royalties lawsuit launched by Toto be dismissed, is yet to comment on the Yankovic action.

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EFF SUPPORTS CLAIM FOR ACCESS TO MEGA SERVERS
An Ohio-based businessman has filed legal papers with a federal court in the US asking that a process be established to let him access legitimate files he had stored on MegaUpload's servers.

As previously reported, when the US authorities took the Mega empire offline in January as well as stopping the rogue company's customers from accessing large quantities of unlicensed music videos, movies and TV shows, they also stopped those who had used the Mega storage service to legitimately store their own content from accessing their files.

Kyle Goodwin runs a business reporting on high school sporting events in Ohio, and owns a lot of video footage from such events. As well as storing files locally, he had back ups on the Mega platform. In an unfortunate twist of fate, it seems his own local hard disk packed up at around the time Mega was forced offline, so the inaccessible Mega servers now contain the only copies of his content.

The two US-based server firms that hosted much of the Mega empire are still holding onto all the data that was previously available via the various Mega websites, but with all of the Mega company's assets frozen, they are not being paid for that storage, which is costing thousands. American prosecutors say they no longer need access to the servers, though the Mega team's lawyers have requested access, as have attorneys preparing a civil case against Mega on behalf of the big US movie studios.

But the question is - how to give those who need it, including customers like Goodwin who have legitimate content stored on the Mega platform, access to all that data. There are both cost and legal implications in doing so, and one of the server companies involved, Carpathia, reportedly filed legal papers of its own last week in a bid to get court approval for a process by which customers can retrieve their files before a to-be-agreed data deletion date.

Meanwhile the Electronic Frontier Foundation, which is representing Goodwin and others affected by the sudden MegaUpload shutdown in January, has said: "The court can help make Mr Goodwin - an innocent party here - whole again. With government seizures growing, we're likely to see more and more cases like this, where lawful customers of a cloud service lose property in a federal copyright case. We're hoping the court will set an important precedent to protect users from overzealous government agents".

The Foundation's IP Director Corynne McSherry added: "Mr Goodwin has suffered a significant loss to his business, through no fault of his own. MegaUpload's innocent users deserve an opportunity to get their important data back before it's destroyed forever".

Elsewhere in Mega news, the controversial digital firm's founder Kim 'Dotcom' Schmitz went back to court in New Zealand last week to try to have his bail terms altered. He wants his web-access ban to be lifted, plus permission to visit an Auckland recording studio owned by Crowded House's Neil Finn where he is keen to complete his previously reported debut album, something I'm sure we'd all like to see finished and released if the wonderful 'Mega Song' is any indication of what we can expect. Local reports suggest prosecutors will only oppose the regular trips to Auckland.

As previously reported, Schmitz and three other former Mega execs are fighting extradition from New Zealand to face criminal charges relating to the Mega operation in the US. The extradition hearing is expected to take place in August.

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CANADA'S JUNOS PRESENTED
It was the Canadian music industry's big awards bash this weekend, and while quite a few of the country's big hitters were no shows (Justin Bieber was too busy getting covered in slime at Nickelodean's Kid's Choice Awards to pick up his Fan Choice Juno), plenty of prizes were nevertheless dished out. And Bieber, Michael Buble and Drake's absence meant more time could be spent enjoying host William Shatner's reliably corny gags and the wonderful news that Leslie Feist was being declared Artist Of The Year.

Here's the main winners from Juno weekend, plus a link to the full list of winners on Toronto.com:

Single Of The Year: The Sheepdogs - I Don't Know
Album Of The Year: Michael Buble - Christmas
International Album Of The Year: Adele - 21.

Artist Of The Year: Feist
Group Of The Year: Arkells
New Artist Of The Year: Dan Mangan
Songwriter Of The Year: Dallas Green
New Group Of The Year: The Sheepdogs
Juno Fan Choice: Justin Bieber

www.toronto.com/article/720634--juno-awards-2012-full-list-of-winners

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SONY NOMS ANNOUNCED
The nominations for this year's big radio awards bash - the Sony Radio Academy Awards - were announced on Friday, and while you might rightly wonder if it's really worth giving over any brain space to an awards venture that suggests Fearne Cotton might be the host of the best music programme on British radio, these are still the UK radio industry's biggest awards.

And to be fair to Cotton (which isn't something we say often), at least she's not a sad old misogynist, like fellow nominees Richard Keys and Andy Gray, nominated for the talkSPORT show they launched after being fired by Sky Sports. Anyway, here are the noms for the main music show categories, while you'll find the full list of nominated programmes and stations at http://www.radioacademyawards.org/nominees/

Best Music Programme: Fearne Cotton (Radio 1), In Tune (Radio 3), In:Demand Scotland (Bauer Radio Scotland), Michael Buble (Magic 105.4), Steve Lamacq (6music).

Best Specialist Music Programme: Another Country with Ricky Ross (BBC Radio Scotland), David Rodigan (Somethin Else/Radio 2), Friday Night Is Music Night (Radio 2), Music: Response (Xfm), The Ronnie Wood Show (Somethin Else/Absolute Radio).

Best Entertainment Programme: Adam & Joe (6music), Beryl And Betty (BBC Radio Humberside), Boogie & Dingo's Big Saturday Show (Bauer Radio Scotland), Frank Skinner (Avalon/Absolute Radio), Real Radio Breakfast (Real Radio Yorkshire).

Breakfast Show (10 million plus potential audience): 5 Live Breakfast (5 Live), Heart Breakfast (Heart London), KISS Breakfast (Kiss FM), Chris Evans Breakfast Show (Radio 2), Christian O'Connell Breakfast Show (Absolute Radio).

Breakfast show (less than 10 million potential audience): Adam Tomlinson (BBC Radio York), BBC Essex Breakfast (BBC Essex), Juice FM Breakfast (Juice FM), Porridge (National Prison Radio), Real Radio Breakfast (Real Radio North East).

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THE HUNDRED IN THE HANDS DETAIL SECOND ALBUM
Eleanore Everdell and Jason Friedman have announced details of 'Red Night', the second album they'll release as Brooklyn-based synth-pop unit The Hundred In The Hands. Due out via Warp Records on 11 Jun, the self-produced record follows the band's eponymous 2010 debut.

Defining the new album's general tone, Everdell and Friedman intone in perfect unison: "From the start there was a darkness that was coming out both lyrically and sonically, the songs were all heartbreak and fear of losing something special, trying to find that better light".

With a set booked at the extremely well-lit Hoxton Square Bar & Kitchen in London on 31 May, THITH are already previewing album track 'Faded' online. You can take advantage of it below, and/or watch this 'Red Night' album trailer.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Np285mnl-AE

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DIRTY BEACHES ANNOUNCE SPLIT COVERS SINGLE
Current touring partners Dirty Beaches and Xiu Xiu are marking this year's Record Store Day with the release of a split seven-inch single, which will be assisted to its 21 Apr issue date by Polyvinyl.

Dirty Beaches' contribution is a dark, dour cover of Francoise Hardy's 'Tu Ne Dis Rien', while Xiu Xiu fulfil their side of the bargain with a version of Erasure's 'Always'. Which, as coincidence would have it, also happens to be the title of Xiu Xiu's new LP. Very sly.

Anyway. Listen to both covers here: soundcloud.com/polyvinyl-records/sets/xiu-xiu-dirty-beaches-split-7

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BEATLES ANNIVERSARY TO BE MARKED BY NEW WEST END SHOW
A new West End show will open in London later this year featuring songs by The Beatles to mark the 50th anniversary of the release of their first ever single 'Love Me Do'.

The first time a West End show has been given permission to use Beatles-composed songs, 'Let It Be' will tell the story of the Fab Four's rise to fame with video clips and live performances of songs like 'A Hard Day's Night', 'Day Tripper', 'Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band' and 'Strawberry Fields Forever'.

The show is being devised by a company called Rain Productions, which previously turned its Beatles tribute act into a Broadway show. The new West End musical will open on 14 Sep and run for four months.

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TAME IMPALA OFFSHOOT POND TO TOUR
Having garnered rapt reviews with their debut album 'Beard Wives Denim', Australian psych set Pond have unfurled a five-date tour in the LP's honour.

The band, which counts Tame Impala's Kevin Parker and Jay Watson among its core cast, will also drop in at The Great Escape (10-11 May), Liverpool Sound City (18 May), London's Field Day (2 Jun), and all three editions of triumvirate city festival Dot To Dot (2-4 Jun).

And now to the tour dates proper:

19 May: Leeds, Cockpit
20 May: Birmingham, Hare & Hounds
22 May: London, Cargo
23 May: Milton Keynes, Crauford Arms
25 May: Glasgow, Arches

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OBERHOFER SETS CAMP DATE
Customarily known by his surname alone, guitar-pop character Brad Oberhofer has announced a standalone show at London's The CAMP in promotion of his forthcoming debut, 'Time Capsules II'.

Paul will air tracks from the album, as is out via Glassnote Records on 16 Apr, with live support from CMU approved band Fanzine, whose own first release, single 'LA', is out on 30 Apr.

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LIL B PREPARED TO GIVE 'LIFE-CHANGING' NYU LECTURE
Yes, Lil B, the rapper perhaps most famed for purporting to be Paris Hilton, is to lead what organisers have termed a "very rare speaking engagement" before the students of New York University.

Hinting at what he might say to enlighten the young minds present at said lecture, which takes place on 11 Apr, the MC informed Fuse Magazine: "I wanna keep that super secret until we get there. But what I will tell you is that I specialise in the progression of humans. It's gonna be a real progressive talk, and when everybody leaves, their lives will be changed".

He added: "Respect to NYU because they really see what I give to the world and they really believe in me. Respect to [NYU President] John Sexton. I got swag like Sexton. Spread the positive".

And you can see Lil B promoting the positive right now in 'Ho Stop Playin', as features on his forthcoming mixtape '#1 Bitch'. Why, I can already feel my mood lifting.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yze_gsDB4Nk

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FESTIVAL LINE-UP UPDATE

COCKROCK, Wellington Farm, Cockermouth, 20-22 Jul: Tinchy Stryder and Buzzcocks have the illustrious honour of headlining Cockermouth's principal live event this year, with The Subways, Goldie Lookin Chain, Karl Phillips & The Midnight Ramblers, Doctor & The Medics and Pikey Beatz also amongst those so far featuring on the CockRock roster. www.cockermouthrockfestival.com

EXIT FESTIVAL, Petrovaradin Fortress, Novi Sad, Serbia, 12-15 Jul: Performing as part of an R&S Records showcase are brand new Exit entrants Lone, Teengirl Fantasy, Pariah and The Chain, who storm the fortress-based festival's 2012 line-up in line with the likes of Duran Duran and Little Dragon. Guns N Roses, New Order, Plan B, Avicii, Richie Hawtin, Gossip, Wolfmother, Azari & III and TEED make up the remaining line-up as it stands so far. www.exitfest.org

GUERNSEY FESTIVAL OF PERFORMING ARTS, The Rabbit Warren, Guernsey, 23-24 Jun: With Kaiser Chiefs at the helm, this live music jewel in the Channel Islands crown will also provide the setting for sets by Daniela Brooker, Friction, Utah Saints, Sam Wire and DJ Wrongtom, a long-time affiliate of Guerney's Old Time New Time Sounds collective, who'll appear with Deemas J and Limey Banton. This lot joins existing bookings Macy Gray, King Charles, The Selecter, Little Barrie and Kassidy. www.guernseyfestival.gg

MAGIC LOUNGEABOUT, Broughton hall, Skipton, North Yorkshire, 27-29 Jul: New additions including The Charlatans and Wave Machines serve to further up the appeal of 2012's Magic Loungeabout line-up, as also features previous announcements Chic feat Nile Rodgers, Benjamin Francis Leftwich, Jenny O and, since they're seemingly omnipresent festival fixtures this year, Cashier No 9. www.themagicloungeabout.net

SHAKEDOWN, Stanmer Park, Brighton, 6 Oct: Lone headliner Dizzee Rascal is the first and foremost fixture of an otherwise empty Shakedown programme, with further bookings yet to be unveiled. www.shakedown.co.uk

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BMG CONFIRMS FURTHER EXPANSION PLANS
At a press conference in Berlin last week Thomas Hesse, now back with Bertelsmann having departed Sony Music late last year, made some comments about the achievements and plans of the v2 BMG music rights company, launched in 2008 after the German media giant sold off its former music assets to Sony and Universal (which is how Hesse ended up working for the former).

Speaking alongside newish Bertelsmann CEO Thomas Rabe, Hesse said BMG had acquired rights in more than one million titles since its 2008 launch, and now employed 300 people worldwide in nine countries. He said Bertelsmann's partnership with equity fund KKR in BMG remained solid, and that both partners were keen to see further growth for the rights firm.

According to Billboard, he told reporters: "The integration of major catalogues such as Bug Music and Chrysalis has resulted in substantial synergistic benefits and positive effects on earnings. In the future we intend to continue acquiring selected interesting catalogues".

He added: "Different from the recorded music market, the music rights business also profits from the digital era based on the fact that, worldwide, music has never been listened to so much as it is today".

Although BMG missed out on both the Warner and EMI publishing catalogues that went on the block last year, it's known to still be looking for other deals to expand its assets, and will likely bid for any publishing (and possibly recordings) catalogues forced to be sold by competition regulators reviewing Universal and Sony's bids to buy the EMI record labels and publishing business respectively. Indeed, as previously reported, BMG is believed to already have bid for three publishing catalogues Universal is planning to sell to help fund its EMI takeover.

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BUXTON'S BUG TO BECOME TV SHOW
Adam Buxton's regular celebration of the music video, Bug, which has its home at BFI Southbank in London but has appeared at various other venues too, is to be adapted into a TV series for Sky Atlantic.

The eight part series will be a celebration of "innovative and groundbreaking videos", with each episode featuring the production of an original music video, guests from the world of music videos and Buxton's reliably amusing summaries of the YouTube comments some top pop promos have garnered in recent years.

Says Buxton of Bug in general, and the upcoming TV version: "I tell people that Bug is like going round to a friend's house and having them open up their laptop and show you interesting and amusing things they've found or made, except not as tedious and shit as that sounds".

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THREE TAKE THAT WIVES EXPECTING BABIES
The partners of no less than three of the Take That chaps are now expecting babies, with Gary Barlow announcing he and his missus were expected child number four back in February, and now Mark Owen and Robbie Williams adding to the man band's baby talk.

Owen is expecting his third child with wife Emma Ferguson, while Robbie Williams took to the net last week to announce he was expecting his first child with other half Ayda Field. Happy times. Especially for Owen, who seems to have repaired his marriage with Ferguson after admitting to alcohol problems and a five year affair two years ago - his happy news coming as Boyzone's Ronan Keating, also subject to affair revelations in 2010, confirmed his fourteen year marriage was over.

Anyway, lots of family affairs there then. And look, for no reason other than this story was originally going to be just about Williams, before Owen and Keating got in with their own announcements over the weekend, here's Robbie's baby statement in full, and in the capital letters he himself used:

"HEY FRIENDLIES, I'VE BEEN KEEPING A SECRET FROM YOU ALL...

ME AND AYDA ARE GOING TO BE MUMMY AND DADDY THIS YEAR!!!

WE HAD SEX! IT WORKS!

WE'VE SEEN SCANS AND CRIED...

LOOKED AT BABIES IN COMMERCIALS AND TEARED UP...

THE NURSERY IS ALREADY PLANNED...

BASICALLY I'M IN LOVE WITH A LITTLE PERSON GROWING IN MUMMY'S BELLY...

AND CAN'T WAIT TO BE A DADDY...

CRYING NOW

MUCH LOVE MUCH JOY

ROBERTO, MUM AND LITTLE BUMP".

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CMU Editor Andy Malt and CMU Business Editor Chris Cooke are both available to comment on music and music business stories. Together they have provided comment and contributions to BBC News, BBC World, BBC Radios 4, 5, 6music and Scotland, Sky News, CNN, Wired and the Associated Press. Email [email protected] or [email protected].

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